Improvised Weapons

In a society were the law abiding citizen is frowned upon for carrying means of self protection, in a world where instituted policies take your fundamental right to protect yourself and flushes it down the toilet by asking you to trust a system that fails to “disarm” real criminals, there are ways for the law abiding citizen to carry weapons that won’t get him in trouble with the system.

In a penitentiary, when a man feels threatened, he will arm himself with whatever he can find. He might sharpen a stick, a piece of Plexiglas, metal, fit a razor blade to a toothbrush etc.… Mister everybody can easily carry “little surprises” that will help him prevail in an attempt on his person. Here are a few suggestions that could be easily used without causing trouble with big brother.

PENCILS. You are on your way to your car… so you grab your trusted HB 2 pencil on your way, pause for a few seconds at the electric sharpener, et voila! Held in the ice pick grip, you can cause facial injuries or jam it in someone’s “equipment” on a rear attack.

TOYS. They make great car weapons. Sports Experts makes a beautiful little aluminum baseball bat. Perfect size for junior. Also perfect to crack a punks head. The idea is to leave it in the car with a baseball glove and a ball. “Your honor, my nephew forgot his things at my place, and my intentions was to drop it at his place on my way home…” You have just justified the presence of the bat in your car. Senshido instructor Mark Ste. Marie has a toy gardening shovel that he got for his son…a fabulous red spade that (after testing) sliced a melon in half in 3 hacks. What officer would give the thing a second glance on you back seat?

TOOLS OF YOUR TRADE. You work in a shop… nobody would question about the “Olfa” box cutter on your belt. You are an electrician you say? A few screwdrivers in a nice little pouch on your belt would not attract any undue attention. I mean, who could tell that you actually sharpened one on a belt sander. OK, so you’re a white collar kind of guy, that’s cool. Take a pen, something stylish, maybe a Parker or if it is within your means, a Mont Blanc, why sacrifice style? Replace the ink thing on the inside by a same diameter steel rod. On the same belt sander (ask the electrician guy…nicely), give the tip a point, not too much, and you have a nice spike that can be used as a kubotan without attracting the unwanted attention.

GROOMING TOOLS. (For ladies) Rat tail combs are great. I would carry one but it is out of fashion for men to have these in their back pockets since 1978. Great to jam in, rake, puncture, and perforate a punk’s face. Take a wooden hairbrush and break the handle with a hammer, you get a nice sharp end. “Sorry your honor, I just couldn’t afford a new brush”. Eyeliner pencil can be used the same way a HB 2 can using sufficient force. Travel size bottles of hair-spray filled with Javex or ammonia are great for spraying the facial area.

YOUR CLOTHING. A little file work on studs can go a long way when dealing with the unpleasant elements of society. You know… It’s not your fault if he rubbed his face on you jacket sleeve and lost an ear. So he decided to hang himself using your tie, what could you do? The buckle of a belt works nicely too when swung like a whip.

However, weapons, even improvised ones such as the myriad’s mentioned above must be used properly and in conjunction with the human body. A good HTHC fighter will not telegraph the use of such weapons and his assailant would only be made aware of them once the damage has already been done.

If you do not know how to fight or use your own natural weapons, do not attempt to use an extension weapon, ever. For the most part, those who used a weapon without knowing how to use their own body, had it taken away and generally used against them. Be wary.

Richard Dimitri

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